Confessions of a Recovering MP

Youare not an executive who can make and enforce decisions. You are a legislatorwho votes on making laws.

Youare not a counsellor, a housing officer, benefits clerk, bank or tradingstandards officer, but you are often expected to provide a new home, sort outbenefits, provide a loan or settle a dispute about a computer game bought forlittle Jimmy that doesn't work.

Youare, in fact, a 21stcentury Member of Parliament representing about125,000 good folk from your constituency by taking your seat in probably thefinest parliament in the world (despite what you may read or hear in themedia).

Youare elected by a simple majority from roughly 50,000 people who mark their 'X'by your name at a general election, hoping that you will be able to make adifference somehow.

Then,when as a new MP, you walk through the Members Lobby filled with a vision ofhow you will leave your mark on this place and this nation, what you are almostcertainly unaware of is that your constituents, your government, the press andthe very institution of the Palace of Westminster have other plans for you.

Soit was for Nick de Bois in May 2010 when, with an unimpressive and insecuremajority of 1,682, he began the journey of a life time, meeting head-on thebizarre, the inexplicable, the touching, the shocking, the vitally importantand, thank god, lots of utter nonsense as well.